ARCHIVIST'S NOTE: This is a recording of Blaire Thompson, and Reyna Winchester, found on an XC memory stick Ms. Thompson kept on her. The audio was corrupted and is being restored, but a transcript was also generated due to the nature of the software used. Ms. Thompson is portrayed as the black text and Ms. Winchester is the red text. Thank you.
THE OFFICECO IT CHRONICLES: By B. Thompson (Though I go by Bitraider online)
So some stuff just happened in my department that I just have got to talk about.
Ok, so I work for some no-name little office-firm, right?
Nobody seems to specifiy just what exactly everyone is doing there, but I am here to assist and educate the staff when they are upset that they cannot get their fancy 21st century corporate laptop to open some ancient amiga-era software because "after SaharaOS had that update I can't get to it anymore." As if they could ever get to it in the first place in the past what, 40 years?!
[THOMPSON CLEARS HER THROAT]
...Anyways...
Tech ramblings aside, I have got to tell you about this thing that happened.
Okay, A user's ethernet cord had stopped working because of a quote, "small tear"...
...
So I elected myself to bravely venture into the warehouse and make a new ethernet cable for the (I can only assume) completely feral user.
Stepping inside I am surrounded by all manner of random office supplies, printers, boxes of spare computers and monitors, and of course, a small stash of ethernet cabling ripe for termination.
I was just about finished terminating the second RJ-45 when...
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACH]
What're you doing?
Hm? Oh- Uh, just uh- trying out the dictation software for a user's machine. Just making sure that the microphone is operational.
You're trying out dictation software...for someone else's machine...on your own machine?
...
lemme see...
I-
...ahhhhh I see you're taking after the BOFH. Throw in some old tech references for the boomers and you might have something for the 40+ crowd...What's this for, Thompson?
Well I uh- I had no tickets to complete...so why not record a little tale to kill a minute or so. In addition, I minored in English...and...still want to get published so...
Fair, you would be an english student haha. I didn't take you as the creative writing type.
[FANS WHIRRING]
...
Anyways, I need your help with something, the scanner in break room #4-
Again?!
Yeah.
I will be there shortly.
[FOOTSTEPS TRAILING OFF]
[CHAIR CREAKS, MICROPHONE IS TOUCHED]
Bitraider out.
END RECORDING. . . . . .